Bibi – The Real Deal

How cool is Bibi Netanyahu?

Seriously, how cool is this guy?

Cool. Way cool.

I mean, how cool is it, that when everybody thought a deal for Shalit was around the corner,

Bibi was working on the Real Deal?

Seriously, how cool is it, that when we thought that in just a few days we’d see Gilad hugging his parents,

Bibi was counting the days to the disintegration of Kadima?

I mean, just how cool is it, that when Gilad was getting slapped around in his cell (I hope that’s the worst he ever had to deal with),

Bibi decided it was time to slap Tzipi Livni around?

Tell me – just how cool is it, that when Aviva and Noam Shalit had to feel guilty once again for closing their eyes in bed when their son was still lying somewhere in Gaza,

That Bibi didn’t even have to blink twice before offering ministerial scrap metal to Kadima back-benchers?

You got to agree: How cool is it, that when Shalit was again given some unidentified slab of material on a plate his captors called “lunch”,

Bibi was looking at the Kadima list of MK’s and just couldn’t decide what to order?

Isn’t it cool, that when Gilad Shalit woke up and scratched day #1,280 on his cell wall,

Bibi was scratching his forehead, pretending that the Shalit deal was the most difficult decision he ever had to make?

And just how cool is it, that when Gilad heard, from the bit of Arabic he must have picked up, that he might be swapped for hundreds of Palestinian prisoners,

Bibi was thinking of a different kind of swap with Livni: “You give me 14 Kadima members, and I’ll give you Silvan Shalom”?

Wow. That is one cool prime minister we got here. Ice running through the veins.

And The Whores Like A Choir

I’m 19. Or 20.

I’m home for the weekend, from the navy.

All I want to do is forget about the navy.

All I want to do is not go back to the base on Sunday.

Don’t want to smell the diesel polluting the sea.

Let the weekend last forever.

It’s Friday.

We’re at the “Second City” (Ha’ir HaShnia).

Me and my buddy Shai.

We’re regulars.

It’s our get-away.

From the uniforms.

From the order.

The discipline.

“Citizens” (Toshavim) of the City, Haifa’s most famous alternative music club.

Sometimes Yoav joins us, sometimes it’s me and the guys from the boat.

We’re together, but each dancing in different places.

Usually as close to the speakers as we can get.

And we can never get close enough.

We’re sipping our big, half liter bottles of Goldstar.

We’ve just spent 5 minutes banging our heads to Rage Against the Machine.

Sweating.

But now we’re chilling to the smooth sounds of The The.

And when Nirvana finish sniffing their teen spirit, we suddenly hear Frank Black, calling out to us:

Hey!!!!!

The Pixies are coming, The Pixies are coming!

I’ll be there.

And if I’m not – then I must have lost my

mind…

A Clear and Present Danger

Last week I saw an interesting interview on TV. It was Avri Gilad hosting Rabbi Dov Wolpe, an extreme right winger. Wolpe heads The Task Force to Save the Nation and the Land, who basically give money to soldiers who refuse to evacuate settlements.

The interview itself wasn’t that interesting, we’ve heard extreme right views a zillion times before, and even more extreme than Wolpe. But I thought the whole package was kind of unique in itself. This is semi-prime-time television, where people like Wolpe are rarely seen. They’re rarely given the spotlight. And if they are, it’s usually on the regular politics shows, not the family talk shows with fairly high ratings.

Gilad, an intelligent man but not the best of interviewers, took a different approach here as well: let’s listen to the guy, and hear what he has to say. No attacks, just a tad of being the devil’s advocate here and there, no more.

What you get is a quiet interview with a very dangerous man, with almost Hannibal Lecter-ish attributes. He’s cool and calm. He even gets the crowd to cheer once (of course, when he talks about how other nations push us around) – and notice how this crowd, as usual in Israeli talk shows, is made up mainly of soldiers. (I never knew why that was… guess they can’t sell all the tickets.)

It’s good insight into someone who really pulls strings in the Wild East. These are the kind of people behind the occupation, the settler movement.  You read about them once in a while in the papers, but never really put the face to the name.

Also, yesterday I saw a link to a Forward story about him (thank you, Lisa Goldman), claiming his organization might be in violation of U.S. tax laws. Again, another reason for my fellow Half & Half readers in the States to be angry, very angry.

So, that’s why I decided to spend a few hours translating this.

(Note: after you press play, if you don’t see the subtitles – press on the arrow button on the bottom right corner of the youtube frame, and make sure the “cc” button is on. Also, if your computer is a bit slow, like mine, sometimes it takes 10-15 seconds for the captions to actually show up. In that case, when they do – just rewind and go back to the beginning. And if anyone can recommend some good subtitle programs other than the youtube one itself – please tell!)