24
Jun
09

Izzie in HolyLand – Part 2

(Part 1
Izzie: Hi baby!
Barack: Hey Iz, where are ya?
Izzie: In my suite in Rome, just got back from a meeting with Silvio…
Barack: How’d it go?
Izzie: OK, I guess… I dunno, he kept asking me if I wanted to come to a party he was having tonight. Something about him, maybe the hair, I dunno… Don’t think I’ll go. Anyway, it’s you I’m thinking about…  I miss you Baracky baby…
Barack: Is that so?
Izzie: I do, really…  I feel like we barely talk anymore.
Barack: Well, I’ve been busy…
Izzie: I know, I know…. I’m just saying.
Barack: You know, I got Iran and everything.
Izzie: I know baby. And I saw you kill that fly, too! Nice one…
Barack: Thanks, honey. Listen, I better get going…
Izzie: Really? So soon?
Barack: Yeah, I got some stuff…
Izzie: OK…. Baracky?
Barack: Yeah Iz?
Izzie: Is everything OK?
Barack: Whaddya mean?
Izzie: I mean, I dunno, you seem kind of distant.
Barack: Nah, it’s nothing, just got some stuff on my mind. Very busy…
Izzie: OK…. but you would tell me if something was wrong, right?
Barack: Sure, of course I would.
Izzie: OK…. because we haven’t really talked since my Bar Ilan speech.
Barack: Really?
Izzie: Yeah, really. You never told me what you thought of it.
Barack: I didn’t? I thought I did….. hmmmm.
Izzie: So?
Barack: So what?
Izzie: How was the speech?
Barack: Oh! The speech! Yeah, yeah…. it was, ummm…. it was good. Yeah, it was good.
Izzie: “Good”?
Barack: Yeah, good. Good speech baby.
Izzie: Just “good”?
Barack: Ummm, yeah.
Izzie:…..
Barack: Good speech. Interesting, too.
Izzie:….
Barack: Yeah, I liked it.angry%20woman
Izzie: ….
Barack: So anyway,
Izzie: ….
Barack: Izzie? You there?
Izzie: You got a lot of nerve, you know that?
Barack: Excuse me?
Izzie: I SAID PALESTINIAN STATE!
Barack: I know you did honey, but –
Izzie: I DID THAT FOR YOU!!!!
Barack: That’s very sweet, Izzie, but –
Izzie: No, YOU but – DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD THAT WAS FOR ME?
Barack: I’m sure it was, but –
Izzie: But what? What can you possibly have to say? Do you know how disgusting those words are to me? Do you have any idea the nausea I felt as they came thru my lips!?!
Barack: Now wait, now just calm down Izzie…
Izzie: Calm down? Calm down? That’s what you have to tell me? Calm down?
Barack: Are you going to let me say something?
Izzie: This is Rahm’s fault, I know it. That self-hating Jew, I’ll kill him, I swear.
Barack: This has nothing to with Rahm, Izzie, this is between you and me.
Izzie: OK. OK. So, why was it just “good”, huh? Why? Go on, spit it out.
Barack: Well, for one thing, I don’t think saying Palestinian state is such a big deal.
Izzie: You’re serious, right? OMG, unbelievable…
Barack: And second, I dunno, you just didn’t look that honest. I mean, actually, I didn’t believe a word you said.
Izzie:…..
Barack: Wasn’t convinced you were actually going to do something.
Izzie:…
Barack: And it’s not about Rahm, I watched the replay alone.
Izzie: Wait, wait wait wait wait…..  did you just say “replay”?
Barack: Yeah, I had this golf game, I couldn’t cancel, so I Tivo’d it, but –
Izzie: I’VE BEEN TELLING YOU ABOUT THIS SPEECH FOR 2 WEEKS AND YOU DIDN’T WATCH ME LIVE?
Barack: Well, I’m sorry, but…
Izzie: You know what, Barack? Just forget it, OK? Forget it. I’m hanging up, and I’m going to Silvio’s party. And I’m cancelling the meeting with Mitchell tomorrow in Paris. So just forget it, and send me the 3 billion dollars, you know the address.
Barack: Yeah, well, you see, here’s the thing Izzie, I wanted to talk to you about that…    Izzie? You there? Izzie? Sh-t, she hung up. I dunno Rahm, she sounds pissed.

Rahm: Don’t worry. I’ll take care of it. These Jewish states tend to be real princesses. It’ll blow over.

Advertisements

9 Responses to “Izzie in HolyLand – Part 2”


  1. June 24, 2009 at 14:06

    It’s like eavesdropping on your brain. 🙂

  2. 6 beckyflybee
    June 24, 2009 at 15:37

    Well done! Terrific!!

  3. June 25, 2009 at 01:11

    Me like plenty!!
    did you just say “replay”?
    Hehehe.. great stuff! We’ll be waiting for the novel!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


June 2009
S M T W T F S
« May   Jul »
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
282930  

Recent Comments

Twitter

  • RT @i24NEWS_EN: ' @AvigdorLiberman's thoughts are like the white man's thoughts - the white man against the others' - Ramy Sayegy, Politica… 11 hours ago
  • RT @i24NEWS_EN: The Nation State Bill - how does Israel compare to other countries? How do Israeli-Arabs feel about this?… 11 hours ago
  • RT @ABC: MORE: Police and emergency personnel responding to the Port Authority Bus Terminal in New York to investigate reports of an "explo… 15 hours ago
  • RT @NBCNews: JUST IN: New York City officials confirm there has been an explosion near 42nd street and 8th Avenue, cause not yet clear 15 hours ago
  • RT @ABC: DEVELOPING: NYPD responding to reports of "explosion of unknown origin" at 42nd Street and 8th Ave in NYC; A, C and E subway lines… 15 hours ago

%d bloggers like this: